TOTALLY ALLOWED ALSO HELLO YOU ARE SO AWESOME.
Everyone had ways of dealing with grief and pain. Some people cried. Some drank. Some went out and found a fight to jump into.
Leonard McCoy found a routine, and then he stuck to it.
So every day at o-seven-hundred, he walked through the doors of Starfleet Medical. He carried a large coffee in his left hand, and had a messenger bag slung over his right shoulder across his chest. He wore ratty jeans and a thin zip up sweatshirt. Flashed his ID badge and waved at the nurses on station. He put his bag in his locker and pulled out his white medical uniform, changing into it with swift efficiency.
And then, at o-seven-twenty-five, he starts his rounds.
He checks on all the crew members from Enterprise, even those with the smallest and most inconsequential of injuries. He checks charts and asks questions and smiles when he says they can be discharged, or claps them gently on the back and says, “You’re makin’ great progress. Be outta here in no time,” when they can’t leave just yet.
He takes a coffee break, eats a plain bagel - toasted with cream cheese - and he re-checks the charts on his PADD.
Then, he goes to Jim’s room.
He shrugs out of his stiff white jacket and slings it over the visitor’s chair. He rolls up the sleeves of his white undershirt, and he washes his hands.
Jim’s chart gets pulled up and synced with his PADD as he pulls out a washcloth and an old-fashioned straight razor.
The washcloth goes into a small tub of hot water, and the razor is set on the table beside the biobed. Bones runs his hands over Jim’s stubble, turning his head to both sides and checking him over for spots missed the last time.
He wrings out the washcloth and drapes it over Jim’s mouth and neck, being careful of the breathing tube that’s taped to Jim’s mouth. He lets it dampen Jim’s skin before he grabs some shaving foam and lathers it on Jim’s cheeks, smooths it over his Adam’s Apple, and rubs it along his upper lip.
And then he picks up the straight razor, and talks.
"Johnstone, the lieutenant from engineering - the one Scotty said was helping him on that shuttle? - he’s been discharged today. His wife is expecting twins. She hugged me so tight I felt them kicking against my stomach." The razor glides neatly over Jim’s cheek, and Leonard wipes the foam off on the still-warm washcloth.
"Speaking of Scotty, he says hello. He came by last night, we went for drinks." Another long line of flesh is revealed in the razor’s wake. "I think he drank for you as well, because I sure as hell wasn’t gonna. God knows how he was even standing, much less able to lecture me on all the upgrades he wants to put in the core. Must be a Scottish thing, because I was just lucky to be awake when we left the bar."
He tilts Jim’s head back and works at the underside of his chin.
"Uhura commed this morning. Her and Spock are going to stop by later. I thought you’d like that, seeing as they were pretty instrumental in saving your life." He turns Jim’s head to the left. "Chekov’s knee is doing better, but after that tumble he took in engineering, he’s on doctor’s orders to rest it for another week or so. Sulu’s staying with him to make sure he doesn’t overdo anything." Leonard chuckles. "Those two… they remind me of us, a bit."
He dunks the razor in the warm water and grabs the cloth again, wiping it down.
"Carol’s… well, she’s not OK, Jim. Not that I could blame her, but… she’s taken this whole thing really hard. I know Uhura’s been talking to her, but I think you should know. She’s been talking about leavin’ Starfleet. So if we ship out and she’s not on board with the rest of us, try to remember it’s not your fault."
Leonard dunks the razor again, grabs the cloth and dunks it before using it to wipe down Jim’s skin. He runs his fingertips over it, checking to see if he missed anything.
The biobed beeps at him, and he glances up at the monitors.
"Increased heart rate. That’s good, Jim." Leonard smiles as he looks down at Jim’s face. "Now hurry up and come back to me."
He places a chaste kiss against Jim’s lips, and ignores the beeping of the monitors.
I HOPE THIS IS WHAT YOU WERE LOOKING FOR AND NO I’M NOT CRYING THERE’S JUST MCKIRK IN MY EYES.